Woman

 This is for the woman I know I love I praise

I know you are the life, reality, and grace

When on a day I lose, I want to be with you

Not knowing I want to cry, but can’t tell it to you

And when you come to me, O baby with your smile,

The pain goes away, away from me for a whole while.

O Yeh! This is for the woman I know I love I praise

I know you are the life, reality, and grace

Tell it to me the way I want, the ways for me that you want

Leaving away the things I like, I like to be with you all night

It’s the good that you see in me, that makes me good all to be

And when I feel good for my life, I know it was u all the time.

Uh Uhh! This is for the woman I know I love I praise

I know you are the life, reality, and grace

When I don’t have you my babe, my life is missing you in awe

When tomorrow you are back, I will wait for the stars to be black

Beneath the sky when I kiss your lips; I will say, you I did miss

When that touch will make me cry, I know my life would pry.

For this is for the woman I know I love I praise,

You are the life, reality, and grace.

                                                          - Deepu

Saying Goodbye

ROAD MOVIE - The Abhay Deol Starrer

Happiness

I never thought I will be alone one day, my friends, my girl & my job will be there with me always. But today sitting on the bench on the road to the beach, I felt I am alone to the extent I can feel. I just sat there looking at the swarm of bikes, cars, people, all going towards the beach to enjoy the evening. They seemed happy. Are they? In true sense of happiness I can’t advocate that. But when will I know when I am happy. I can’t understand the sense of happiness. Is it viable?

I pondered on these philosophical aspects of my life. Had a fear too, do I need to know the answers to these questions. Will finding the answers to these questions really make me happy. I guess some unanswered questions help us to live life. We wait for the answers and thus live along with it – the questions.

            Guys, Its evening prayer time now, will write after I pray…

I just wondered when I was happy today. Was it when I got to sleep till 10:30 in morning or was it when I ate the fried Pomfrets cooked by Dad or was it when I stimulated an act of love to my girl in the afternoon or was it when I fagged after that or was it when I spoke with Jasmine after a long time or is it now when I am writing this. These moments did make me smile, my heart was thinking and my brain sidelined.

            Friends just got a message from my girl now just wanted to share, that’s weird     “Hmmm…. I think that” I messaged back a “?”

Anyways, sitting there on the bench I tried to call all my friends so that I could share my time and rug out these uncanny feelings. They were making me restless. I tried Srujal – he was out of town, he also shared that Sivish is out of town too. I called Vikas he was visiting one of his family friends and will meet in another half an hour. I called my girl and disconnected, I dint want to talk to her about it otherwise she will be all concerned. I called an old office colleague, she dint pick up. I called Siby, he answered.

            My girl now replied “I have fallen in love again, today, just now…” Stumped I      shot back “How come?” Now this has started to bug me...  I can’t concentrate,          she is up to something.

Coming back to the call with Siby, we as usual started off on a light note. Both of us realized that it was Brian’s wedding yesterday and we dint wish him. We called him and had a conference call. Taking pot shots on him and ultimately making him realize that he is no more a bachelor we hung up. Poor thing could not even react as he has to play the decent groom role in front of his in laws. Siby and I continued our discussion. The topic was marriage. We both as it seems are unaware of a constant desire that is developing in our mind. “I got to get married” As Siby said “We have high hopes regarding our marriage & married life, It will be as if one fine day the church bells will ring for us in a special tone and the angels come down on earth and bestow their blessings in the form of a super sweet, understanding and a beautiful girl.”  Now when we know that’s not going to happen in the order it is said; still we have high hopes I guess. The main attribute that we discussed about is that marriage changes a person. We quoted many live examples in real life. The priorities change and we tend to be more practical (a guy thing). After marriage guys turn to be unsentimental towards their friends (guys again). They don’t care whether the guy whose underwear he used share in an eternity of his life is even wearing one today. Well we can argue that it’s none of his business but the line is just a personification of the great eternity of time. The chat with Siby was refreshing and I enjoyed every bit of it.

            Oh! There is a message in my inbox, God it should be her (my girl). The message   runs like this…“Just now, I closed my eyes and fell in love with you all over again”. See my girl, how I can not love her more even more than this. Hey SHE      when you read this please try to understand why I am not reacting back. I m          writing naa…

Thereafter, I sat there on the bench, exactly an hour after we spoke, Vikas called that he is coming. He brought some cigarettes which we enjoyed sitting on the bench talking about ourselves and about everything we laid our eyes on. It was getting dark and we left for our home.

End of the day I was happy. I am I guess…

Real

Oh this life boasts of unreal prejudices

Eluding in time human essences

Tramping on sentimental provocations

Living on counts of barter relations

Gestures of woven unthinking stigma

Relying on dark shady alarms of trauma

Probing the soul for justified illusions

Answers to life still enigmatic transgressions.

The Applicator Video - Funny

Click Me to View the Video

Con Call Threat

Sitting in the office and after a long talk with my friend and friend's wife and friend's cousin (2 yr old) i am feeling good now. I was little low on account of my non-performance on a whacky front in my KRA. This made me think, that i need to concentrate and manage it more efficiently to avoid situations like today's in future.

However, my chat with my friend and friend's wife and friend's cousin turned out to be a hilarious one. Though I am under threat from my friend (husband in context with friend's wife) which is surely gonna be a thunder down under. A con call has been scheduled tonight making it a dangerous situation.

Aasman se tapka Khajur me Atka...

Issues are many, say; Snoopy the famous pet and its alleged linkage to (cannot be mentioned here), my calls to my friend which raises an eyebrow every time its leaked (i guess my gurl is also having some doubts), no calls to my friend (husband in context with friend's wife) in an entire week etc etc etc....

Some advice to myself... keep your cool.... dont panic.... you have done nothing wrong....you just call your friend once in a day....what can u do if you are inclined towards girls....good that proves you are not gay.... you can handle your friend (husband in context with friend's wife) easily....Why are you writing about it...... PHATTU......what will my girl think........Oh my God! i will publish this thing......

God save the world...its good i m still in this world.

My Blog: My Gurl's reaction to my Blogs

My Void: Do you smoke? You lied to me isn't it... Tell me the truth...Who sang the song for.... when did u call her... how can u call a gurl other than me at midnight...why did she sing a song for you....Do u have 2 gfs... who is the other one...whats her name...u r lying isn't it. Why did you drink....that too 3 pegs in a car... why did u waste money...Why dint you call me if i dint call you...

THEY & me: Who was the girl u stared in the train.... was she pretty....... and how dare you stare her breasts... whose pic is it in the blog.... u are a dog...

08/29/09: How much due u have.... how many credit cards.... we need to plan it out... y don't u listen to me.... i m talking to you...

Hey SHE..... Above all this... and more than anything else...       

My Blog: My Void

84 mm Gold Flake Kings - the cigarette; as it is usually known was beginning its journey to glory and commemoration. Holding it in my hands at ten min past midnight and standing on the door of the Gujarat Queen Express train, I was treading into the void. The dark clouds made the night even more colorless. I was looking into the baleful night and recalling the many things that happened in the day while sending the fumes of nicotine-less smoke in to the air.

A very sweet friend of mine sang a song – Kehna hi Kya (Bombay) – for me a while ago and I was really touched by her voice, the sleep that was drowsing into me just ran out of the train door and committed suicide. She my friend is in love and I have noticed a distinct blaze in her… may be all people in love has it. One other college friend was really fuming on me when she learnt that I got two gfs. The way she scorned me made me jump off my seat three times. My good friend Siby was giving me a crash course on why to get married before it’s too late and that its not easy to get a girl when it comes to marriage. Hope he is right and wrong at the same time.

While having drinks with my office staff in the basement of the office parking lot in a car holding on to the plastic glasses and some nuts we had a hilarious time. The Blender’s Pride started kicking in after the usual third peg and I came out from the car with my sympotes (Greek for fellow-drinker) to burn some air, there he gave me his story a good touching one. I felt I knew him now and that he is qualified to be my sympotes. The story covered the entire run from my office to the station with wild abuses, strong feelings and emotional natural setups.

Finishing off for the day at half past nine we decided to have drinks and enjoy the hard day at work. Of the 300 bucks I had I gave away 200 for my share in the drinks and then a 100 for the soda and cigarettes. I can see myself wasting money and also realized that the day dint have any of the glamour it used to have so why not end it in style.

In the morning I boarded my train, as usual I wished She (my gf) good morning and she dint replied.

Standing at the door of the train at this time of the night I was treading into the void… 

My Blog: THEY & me

I liked her eyes today. So sweet to look at. Thought for a while what if she ll look at me just once with those beautiful eyes. Right now i feel we should meet, our eyes should at least. I was intending not to, but i could see my eyes rolling down to her lips as if i was trying to kiss them with my... suddenly i realized i m staring at her breasts and was stunned by its formation. WO!

The way THEY defied gravity and as if longing for my touch made me th most sinful beast alive. The train was kind enough to give its usual warble and send some vibes to THEM and THEY were waving out to me in bold lines 'check me out'. Wish i could just take off... The feeling; I meant.

Meanwhile when all this was churning in my mind her friend had an eye on me. Her eyes at 60 degree from mine was keeping a track of my illicit act. Th instant i hit the firewall i was conscious of my deeds. The beast in me retraced back  to the darkness from where it came from. Her friend (now my enemy) said something to her in an undertone that made her look grave. She was now holding the grim face and staring right through my eyes into my soul. 

And with a feeling of alleged culpable homicide, i held my face up to her and questioned her with my eyes... i dint knew what was i doing at that point of time, however i went with a line from George Jones' famous song "For if you loved a liar, darlin', you'd hug my neck". You must have noticed that in life all things good or bad happen just a little later... around the turn of the road; now she as the crow flies looked straight into the eyes of the guy siting beside me (that as****e) and with that moist lips smiled back at him (that son of a gun) and with a discreet hand shifted her scarf (dupatta in hindi)  to a penchant altitude.

The enemy now had a sneaky face still 60 degree from mine...

My Blog: Onam Celebrations

Onam is the biggest festival in the Indian state of Kerala. Onam Festival falls during the Malayali month of Chingam (Aug - Sep) and marks the homecoming of legendary King Mahabali. Carnival of Onam lasts for ten days and brings out the best of Kerala culture and tradition. Intricately decorated Pookalam, ambrosial Onasadya, breathtaking Snake Boat Race and exotic Kaikottikali dance are some of the most remarkable features of Onam - the harvest festival in Kerala.

Source: http://www.onamfestival.org/

Wish you a Happy Onam!!.... Cheers